The Geography of the Heart

They say home is where the heart is. A comforting sentiment, isn't it? But what happens when your heart has outposts? When pieces of it reside thousands of miles away, across an ocean and a time difference? It's a question I've been pondering a lot lately, as our family tapestry stretches between the sun-kissed shores of Hawaii and the familiar landscapes of Washington.

Blending a family is a beautiful and intricate process, full of unexpected joys and, yes, inevitable challenges. When you add geographical distance to the mix, those challenges take on a different dimension. It's the missed bedtime stories, the birthdays celebrated via video call, the constant calculation of time zones to catch a quick "hello." There's a subtle ache in knowing you're not there for the everyday moments, the impromptu pizza nights, the casual check-ins that build the foundation of shared experience.

I often find myself staring at the map, tracing the miles between here and there. Each inch feels like a moment I can't fully participate in. And while technology is a marvel – those video calls are lifelines – there's still a longing for a real hug, a shared meal around the same table. Just the other day, my youngest drew a picture for his older brothers, a vibrant explosion of island colors. Holding it, I wished I could see their faces light up as they received it, instead of just describing it over a screen.

But distance, as they say, makes the heart grow fonder. We've learned to be intentional in our connections. The carefully planned video calls become cherished rituals. The small packages we send are filled with love and little pieces of our Hawaii life. We mark the calendars with anticipation for visits, those precious times when the miles melt away, even if just for a little while. It's about building bridges, one message, one call, one carefully chosen gift at a time.

And in this unique geography of our hearts, I've also discovered unexpected beauty. The boys in Washington have their own home, their own life, and knowing they are loved and cared for brings a sense of peace. Our time together, when it happens, is all the more treasured, the moments more deliberately savored. And here in Hawaii, our little family unit has grown stronger, our bonds deepening as we navigate this reality together.

So, is home just a place? Or is it truly where the heart resides, no matter how far-flung its pieces may be? I'm still figuring that out. But I'm learning that love has an incredible capacity to stretch and adapt, to find connections across oceans and time zones. And while the geography may be challenging, the heart, in its resilient way, always finds its way to where it belongs.

What are your experiences with long-distance love, whether with family or friends? I'd love to hear your stories and insights in the comments below or over on my Instagram (@yourinstagramhandle), where you can also catch this week's "column in motion" for a more visual take on this topic.